My new motto, creed, mantra, what-have-you: YES to everything.
Of course that comes with a caveat: YES to everything – unless it is inherently destructive, unhealthy or deliberately hurtful.
But apart from that disclaimer, I say: Bring it on.
After bidding a final good-bye to the man I love desperately, I cried hard for several days, drenched in self-pity, wallowing in my misery, railing against fate.
And on the third day, I rose and did what any broken-hearted, self-protecting girl would do:
I baked a pie.
This was no ordinary pie.
It was the pie of redemption, it was the pie of acceptance, it was the pie of moving on, it was the pie of re-awakening. As I patted and pressed and mixed and stirred, I could feel my mind shifting: first focusing solely on my action in the moment, then gradually releasing the immediate pain of the past few days and finally starting to let go of the longer, more lingering pain of the past eight months.
When the pie was finished, so was I. The pain had diminished somewhat, but the love remained: like my pie, it tasted achingly sweet, but with a sharp tang.
It was time to move on.
And I suddenly found myself, post-pie, saying Yes to offers, invitations and suggestions that I would have declined in the past.
I said Yes to whatever came my way this past weekend, jumping from chanting and healthy mindfulness with one group to decadent late night hookah (my first attempt) with another. Toss in my visit to the psychic and you can see where the weekend was headed: crazy, fun, exciting, invigorating, filled with new people, unusual activities, a fresh perspective on the world.
Because I said Yes to a new Friday night activity, I met a new yoga teacher. The teacher invited me to his Sunday class. Because I said Yes to his Sunday class, I wound up with a pass to the spa in the hotel where the class was held. There I spent a decadent afternoon lolling in the steam sauna and relaxing in the hammam, becoming closer to a classmate whom I’d always liked, but never really spoke with at length.
This is the power of Yes: So many unexpectedly wonderful opportunities unfolded, all because I said Yes to whatever landed in front of me.
So when Tantra Man sent an email Friday night, again inviting me to visit him, this time with an offer of financial assistance and the continued promise of no expectations, I said Yes. After all, what’s the worst case scenario? A relaxing weekend spent luxuriating in a hot spring, partaking of three available (free!) yoga classes per day and hiking in the mountains in the company of someone whom I find pleasant, attractive and easy to talk with? Seriously – what did I have to lose? Yes, yes, yes!
I’m learning Yes leads to more Yes, which leads to empowerment, confidence and taking charge.
My transition to Yes has been building slowly, I realize, without my conscious knowledge. It may have started about two months ago, when I said Yes to something that loomed large and frightening in my mind: teaching a yoga class. I survived, I learned, I even enjoyed. And this is where Yes begat more Yes: Emboldened by my experiences, I said Yes to a reprise. And that Yes led to taking charge: I volunteered to teach yoga to my fellow employees as part of the upcoming fitness challenge. Their enthusiastic Yes upended my basic plan for a small after-work group and expanded it into a full-blown class located in a city park’s spacious community center.
Of course I can do this. Oh, Yes! I can.